Sunday, January 13, 2008

The Dance

I am still trying to patch together the mental images from Saturday night into a cohesive, epic tapestry of tiny jean skirts with flip flops (in January!), little boys swaying with girls twice their size and the awkward humping that passes itself for dancing before the girls go back to their friends blushing and the boys shake out the legs of their khakis.

Got up north early, had a solid BLT at Lake Forest staple "The Lantern" and made it to the dance on time. As we were putting our things away in Caro's office, Jaimeson found his own middle school yearbook. Back in 1988, our friend was hanging out in the science lab and playing in the band. Didn't your mother always tell you that the nerds would end up being the most interesting ones?
*TKTC note: I'm not throwing stones at glass houses, I was trying to start my own Greenpeace chapter and in training to be a peer mediator in middle school.
My chaperone resume photo, courtesy of a fellow nocturne now adjusting to PST.

Anyhow, once we had our position assigned, all of the petit hooligans were just making a beeline for Jaimeson. The little guys who want to be big guys testing their boundaries with someone who is actually big. Hilarious. One of my favorite mental snapshots is a flock of boys tossing each other around into bleachers etc and Jaimeson approaching quietly then grasping them firmly by the scruff of the neck and telling them to chill out. Wood floors aren't soft and little boys respond to that trick just like puppies.

Songs Generation _ is listening to:
Satisfaction by Benny Benassi & the Biz
Bubbly by Colbie Caillat
Heaven by DJ Sammy
Cotton-Eyed Joe by Rednex
Hey There Delilah by the Plain White T's
something by Hannah Montana

It's funny being around them- you feel a little more prone to awkward silences and mysterious tension just by association. More than anything, we established that there was really no amount of money that would make us go through that again. But for them, it's the first time. And as much as you want to feel badly for them, they're also having the best time they know how to have while they still have room in their growth plates and strangely stuffed bras. It gets better from here for them. And they'll know that when they get there.
As for the rest of the weekend, we took our hard-earned chaperone cash to McCormick's and I bought Jaimeson an O'Douls for scraping gum off the gym floor with me (TKTC Note: This sobriety thing is soo easy on the wallet. I think he may be onto something!). I even got flowers out of it from the bartender. Also managed to watch my first episode of Dr. Who- "The Pirate Planet" circa 1978. Definitely some absurdly funny stuff in there but even more amusing when watching it with someone who is laughing hysterically at lines like, "Doctor, beware; your manner appeals only to the homicidal side of my nature."

Due to serious/fun curfew breakage, I didn't roll out of bed until close to noon and apart from a brisk walk to get milk, didn't leave my house until sushi at Shine with Marianne that night.

Alas, my dears, it's Monday now and all good things must come to an end. Or at least an extended pause till next time.


Susie said...

Awww that sounds like so much fun. Does not make me miss my middle school days though. Ugh no. I still can't believe I made it out alive.

ToKissTheCook said...

I'm still shocked that they paid us. Seriously, it feels a little wrong based on the fact that it felt a little like watching a living anthropology exhibit at the Museum of Natural Science.

camille said...

LOVE this.

Allison said...

you were a CHAP-er-EAUne ... okay that made a little more sense and was a LOT funnier in my head - but you are wearing a very cute chapeau in that foto.

D$ said...

its lake forrest, what did you expect? they have money coming out of their ears. but seriously, i would pay them to let me chaperone a jr high dance--how can i say that without sounding creepy?

ToKissTheCook said...

Cam- Thanks!

Joner- Perfection. In fact, I'm in LOVING this. We were chapeaurones indeed.

D$- You can't say it without being creepy, you just kinda have to do it anyway. The kids were pretty good, even the punks didn't seriously think they were get away with anything.